No it's not exactly like that. Firstly, your 2) in your Jamroom list is wrong: nobody can send any private messages to anyone until the Follow is completed both ways (and that's the SAME way in Ning).
This is more accurate I think:
1) I click "add Friend' on Bob's profile page. That sends a notification email to Bob and the circuit is now half complete. Nobody can send private messages yet.
2) Bob clicks the link in the notification to 'Accept' it (thus completing the two way connection). We are now both on each other's Friend List and can now both send each other private messages. (Bob doesn't have to go to or look at my profile page to accept my friend request.)
1) I click "Follow" on Bob's profile page. That sends a notification email to Bob and the circuit is now half complete. Nobody can send private messages yet.
2) Bob clicks the link in the notification which brings him to my Profile page, where he can check out who I am first and then click the follow button to "Follow" me as well (thus completing the two way connection). We are now both on each other's Followers List and can now both send each other private messages.
The only difference is that on Jamroom when you get your email notification telling you that you have a new Follower, when you click the link it doesn't actually complete the circuit- rather it takes you to the other person's profile page, where you click 'Follow' back. It IS one extra click, but it's not really twice the number of steps.
In some ways it's an extra little effort, but in other ways it's nice because you get people to actually go look at each other's profile pages first, before they click to Follow back. This often creates new activity- I find people leave more comments on each other's comments this way. But yes, it's an extra click.
Like I mentioned before, I also added a line of instructions to my template for the Follow Email Notice, making it clear that the person should click to go to the other person's page and click the Follow button to complete and permit private messages to happen.
My members had quite a few little complaints that things were not exactly the same as on Ning. But then they began to see all the wonderful new features we didn't have working in Ning, and they started going Ooooh! more instead of Ackk! lolol
One of my fave things I noticed at first was that: when members forgot their passwords and the 'forgot password' process on Ning didn't work for them (which was often), I couldnt do a damn thing except tell them to open a new membership account. Now I can just say "No problem!" and zip over to their page and change their password for them quick as a wink- this makes them soooo happy to not lose all their old profile stuff! For every one thing that I might wish was a little different on JR, there are like ten other things I'm doing the happy dance about every day.
The big thing to get used to in your head is that everything is Profile-based... everything is 'owned' by a profile. Once you understand how JR works concerning Profiles, Users, and Quotas, it'll help you a great deal in hitting your stride.
One concept about following to understand is that:
By default, a member can 'Follow' you and be one of your Followers simply by clicking the Follow button on your page. Technically, they're not 'sending you a request to follow you'...they're just following you. And you get a notification (if you allow site notifications in your member settings) that simply tells you someone new is (already) follwoing you, and that you can follow them back if you want, and here's how. Now, a member can check the option to Approve new followers before allowing them to follow them, but that's not the default.
Think of following as like exchanging business cards. If I give you my card with my contact info, I still can't contact you until you give me your card in return. By 'following' me back, you are in effect giving me YOUR card too, and we can then communicate back and forth.
...just another satisfied Jamroom customer.
Migrated from Ning to Jamroom June 2015